TAKE THE HIGH ROAD

highroadFirst of all, let me clarify what “the high road” isn’t.

  1. Stoners will tell you the expression means “get stoned.”  Not what I mean.
  2. Nor am I referring to the British soap opera from 1980 – 2003.
  3. It certainly doesn’t mean a treacherous mountain pass in the Himalayas

When you “take the high road” it means doing the right thing even if is not popular or easy. However, many people believe that for one person to “take the high road” infers that the other person isn’t.  Sometimes this is true, that one individual is treated unfairly by another.  In this case, taking the high road means don’t stoop to someone’s tactics and be drawn into the muck. You can control how you respond to any situation. Things happen but time marches on. Remaining calm and civil will prevent any argument from escalating. Never, ever, say anything or do anything that you would regret at a later date.

But too many times, a person has to feel that he or she is the victim, and that they are taking the high road by burning at the stake.  True victims have all the rights to be justified in their anguish, but negative energies only take away from the possibilities for positive energy. Consider heroes like Gandhi or Mandela who could have easily thrown in the towel. Bad karma merely manifests. Taking the high road leaves the poison below.

Let me also suggest to you that just because one person takes the high road, it doesn’t automatically place the other person in the gutter. Two people can simultaneously become polar opposites in how they feel, yet neither is necessarily wrong. Just look at politics. If such disagreements can’t be resolved, each person should take the high road, although it is not always going to be on the same pathway.

Even when the chemistry of a love affair or long-term friendship has soured, it’s better to drift apart rather than to blow apart. Feelings can sometimes change inalterably during a long-term relationship. Taking the high helps prevent the ruination of that relationship.  Hopefully, if love makes the world go around, Dating for Life will always keep it spinning. But even if a marriage must end, when two people both take the high road, they can preserve a friendship.  The Golden Rule is golden with good reason.

MARK CUBAN—DATING COACH?

markI recently watched an episode of Shark Tank when Mark Cuban said “No matter how many times you get shot down, you will get smarter, better.” In my business career, I’ve had a total of four career-type jobs.  Truthfully, I learned from all of them, but the fourth one was my “career maker.”  I’ve also invested in or started eight companies, of which only two made it big. Mark Cuban also says that’s all you need—one big success. I only batted one-for-four, but that would make me a lot of money as a major league baseball player.

So let’s look at love. How many relationships have you had in your life?  Me, I’ve dated many, many times in my life, but I’ve only had eight relationships that lasted more than a few dates. Two of them turned into long-term successes.  My current relationship is the absolute true love of my life.  Again, I only batted one-for-four.

Mark Cuban has another well-known quote. “It comes down to finding something you love to do and then just trying to be great at it.” Maybe Mark Cuban should be a dating coach, for his business analogies apply. If you don’t get in the market and give it your best shot, how will you ever succeed? Mark, I’m sure you know a similar quote from Alfred Lord Tennyson’s poem In Memoriam, which was written back in 1850: “’Tis better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all.”

Every now and then an entrepreneur starts his first project and strikes gold. Not very often. Similarly, I’m sure you’ve met an elderly couple that fell in love in their early teens and never looked back. Bless them all.  However, this is the exception rather than the rule. For most of you, life will be much more a complex cornucopia of options. Over the years you will have multiple jobs, and probably several relationships.  In either scenario, when you find a “true love,” do your best to honor it and be great in it. It may take you several tries to find it, but life was meant to be lived. Go for it! And when you find it, never alter what got you to the altar!

TRENDS IN DATING

Business People Profit ChartTrue or False:

  1. On-line dating for everyone including married folks
  2. On-line dating is not very expensive
  3. Nearly everybody lies about their profile on-line
  4. On-line dating requires a strategy relative to the type of site
  5. The 3-day rule of getting back to a day is dead; Nexting requires next day follow-up
  6. Detox dating—Even less people that get married today met over a drink than 10 years ago.
  7. Ghosting is a coward’s way of getting out of a relationship
  8. Relationship churn—Nearly ½ of couples today break up and get back together at least once.
  9. The manicorn hunt. Women are obsessed ith finding the perfect guy, rather than someone who is a decent fit at first blush
  10. Men with headaches—Men are actually turning down sex more than women these days
  11. In bigger cities, a higher percentage of unmarried young women out earn young men than vice versa.
  12. 10% of women want to be proposed to with a serenade
  13. Globally, more women want out of marriages than men because they are trapped into the marriage by failed government policies
  14. Dating for Life is a proven way to honor any individual with good old fashioned chivalry.

Hint:  All are true!