chivalrycardThere is a popular expression among males related to the “man card.” For example, my brother-in-law and I were coaxed into seeing the premiere of Sex in the City with our wives.  He and I feigned a fear of losing our man cards. Certainly, a “manly man” would be putting his masculinity on the line by attending this movie. In a similar sense, any man or woman who consistently shows a lack of respect is at risk of losing their chivalry cards.

Prince Charming is only charming when actions equate to image. The same can be said for Cinderella. Manners make a difference. No matter how dashing or eloquent any individual may be, actions speak louder than words. Arrogance and disrespect trump out initial first impressions in the long run.

A man who never opens a door for a woman is displays the same lack of chivalry as a woman who fails to acknowledge it. A man who is late for a date shows disrespect but so does the woman who makes him wait after his arrival. When a person begins texting while the other sits at a dinner table, it is disrespectful of the other.  The chivalry card is at risk of being yanked.

Relationships are never static, always dynamic, either spiraling upward or downward. When two people show mutual respect, the relationship spirals upward. When one person allows another to be disrespectful or even abusive, the relationship becomes one-sided and over time the enabler becomes a doormat. Sadly, doormats ironically get what they deserve: a loss of self-esteem and few sustainable relationships. How to prevent this from happening will be discussed in my next article.

A mutually beneficial relationship is when two people never stop dating. Anyone on a first date is likely to be on his or her best behavior. Relationships erode when chivalry erodes. Dating for Life has four keys that work for any two people who get together, whether in business or personal endeavors, family or friends, or even the most awe-inspiring love affair ever.


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