FIFTY WAYS TO PLEASE YOUR LOVER—PART THREE

ellen

“The answer is easy if you take it logically…”

The second line of Paul Simon’s great song also paves the way. Think about how you would like to be treated. Would you want a friend to leave you hanging? Of course not! The Golden Rule “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” is infallible logic to dating.  Dating for Life is about enjoying the day and enjoying the date. Here are the third five of fifty pointers on how you can make things special in your ANY relationship.

 11. Do your homework.  If this is a first date, there is this incredible thing called “The Internet” and thanks to Google, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Match.com or whatever other sources you have access to, you can learn a great deal about your date and what he/she likes and dislikes in advance.

12. In advance, think of several interesting topics of discussion as it relates to your date, to your event, or mutual connections. Winging it works sometimes, but never run out of things to talk about.

13. Even more important, however, is think about how to be a good interviewer. If you watch the best emcees on TV, they engage with the guests by asking relevant questions and let the guest talk. Poor emcees tend to stop the flow by trying to crack a joke, and often the interview never gets back on track. For example, have you noticed how talk show formats are increasingly using informal couches versus a set design where the interviewer sits behind a desk?  There’s a reason—to make the interviewee feel more comfortable

14. People who ask questions only so that they can answer them are a turn-off. Always ask open-ended questions that allow your date to participate fully.

15. It’s easy to engage in a conversation by using open-ended questions in any type of scenario. “How do you like living in Chicago?” is an open-ended question that will normally yield a more detailed response. “Do you like Chicago?” more than likely solicit a “Yes” or “No” response. Be wary of asking questions like “Give me five reasons why you like Chicago” because it can be awkward for some dates as they may feel that they are being put on the spot. The goal of engaging conversation is engagement, not putting someone under a spotlight.

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